I am the very Model of a Modern Major-General

May 2024 · 7 minute read

I am the very Model of a Modern Major-General
The Gilbert & Sullivan Festival Chorus And Orchestra Lyrics


Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴  Line by Line Meaning ↴I am the very model of a modern Major-General,
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical,
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical;
I'm very well acquainted too with matters mathematical,
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical,
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news---
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.
I'm very good at integral and differential calculus,
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous;
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.

I know our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's,
I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox,
I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus,
In conics I can floor peculiarities parablous.
I can tell undoubted Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies,
I know the croaking chorus from the Frogs of Aristophanes,
Then I can hum a fugue of which I've heard the music's din afore,
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore.

Then I can write a washing bill in Balylonic cuneiform,
And tell you every detail of Caractacus's uniform;
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.

In fact, when I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin",
When I can tell at sight a chassep"t rifle from a javelin,
When such affairs as sorties and surprises I'm more wary at,
And when I know precisely what is meant by "commissariat",
When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery,
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery:
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy,
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a gee---

For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury,
Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century;

But still in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.


Overall Meaning

The song "I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major-General" is a classic example of Gilbert and Sullivan's witty and satirical approach to operetta. The song is sung by the character of Major-General Stanley, who is describing himself as the epitome of a modern military officer. He boasts about his knowledge of various fields like history, mathematics, science, and literature. He claims to know everything from the kings of England to the square of the hypotenuse, and can even identify a chassepôt rifle from a javelin.


Through his boasting, Major-General Stanley ironically presents himself as an outdated figure, rather than a modern one. This is reflected in the line, "For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury, has only been brought down to the beginning of the century." He may have a wealth of knowledge, but it is limited to a bygone era, and he is out of touch with modern advancements.


The song is a perfect blend of witty lyrics, unforgettable melody, and perfect rhymes. It has been parodied in various forms, such as "I Am the Very Model of a Modern Network TV Show" and "I Am the Very Model of a Modern Celebrity." The song has become so popular that even NASA scientists created a version for amateur radio operators.


Line by Line Meaning

I am the very model of a modern Major-General
I possess knowledge of an all-encompassing range of subjects, and therefore epitomize the ideal contemporary Major-General


I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral
I have knowledge regarding various categories such as flora, fauna, and rocks


I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical
I am familiar with the monarchs of England, and I can recall past battles and their details


From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical
I can arrange historical battles chronologically from the battle of Marathon to that of Waterloo


I'm very well-acquainted too with matters mathematical
I possess thorough knowledge of mathematics


I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical
I comprehend and can solve equations of varying complexities


About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news
I have an abundance of knowledge in binomial theorem


With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse
I can present numerous fascinating pieces of information about the hypotenuse's square


I'm very good at integral and differential calculus
I am proficient and knowledgeable in integral and differential calculus


I know the scientific names of beings animalculous
I am familiar with the scientific names of microscopic organisms


In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
When it comes to the aforementioned categories, I excel and possess vast knowledge


I know our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's
I have extensive grasp of our mythic heritage and are knowledgeable on King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's tales


I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox
I am capable of solving complex acrostics and enjoy contemplating paradoxes


I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus
I can recite Heliogabalus' crimes in elegiac poetry form


In conics I can floor peculiarities parablous
I have acquired knowledge about conic sections, including elaboration about parabolas' unique aspects


I can tell undoubted Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies
I distinguish without doubt a Raphael's masterpiece from those of Gerard Dow and Zoffany


I know the croaking chorus from the Frogs of Aristophanes
I have learned and can remember the raucous choir in Aristophanes' 'The Frogs'


Then I can hum a fugue of which I've heard the music's din afore
I am capable of humming a fugue whose melody and rhythm I have heard before


And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore
I can whistle all of the songs from the insufferable opera 'Pinafore'


Then I can write a washing bill in Balylonic cuneiform
I am capable of writing a bill for laundry expenses in Babylonian cuneiform script


And tell you every detail of Caractacus's uniform
I am well-versed in the history of Caractacus' uniform in detail


In fact, when I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin"
In fact, when I have fully grasped the meaning of technical terms such as 'mamelon' and 'ravelin'


When I can tell at sight a chassepôt rifle from a javelin
When I can distinguish between a chassepot rifle and a javelin with ease, upon sight


When such affairs as sorties and surprises I'm more wary at
When I become more cautious and alert regarding matters such as sorties or surprises


And when I know precisely what is meant by "commissariat"
Furthermore, when I fully comprehend and can define 'commissariat'


When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery
When I acquire knowledge regarding technological advancements present in contemporary gunnery


When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
When I am more knowledgeable about tactics compared to non-experts; such as a novice in a nunnery


In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
In summary, when I have basic knowledge in fundamental strategy


You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a gee-
I am confident that you will acknowledge me as the better Major-General you have encountered


For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury
Despite having a brave and daring attitude, my military knowledge thus far is limited


Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century
My experience with military matters is limited to the recently begun century


But still in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral
Despite the aforementioned limitation, I excel concerning domestic and geological matters


I am the very model of a modern Major-General
Again, my general expertise spans a multitude of categories, making me the ideal modern Major-General


Lyrics © O/B/O APRA AMCOS
Written by: W. S. Gilbert, Arthur Sullivan

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind

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